Let me first say that I am VERY, VERY happy with my share of the money made off of our yard sale. But, it is hard work! Two straight days of getting up at 0500, followed by 4-5 hours of trying to get people to buy your crap is rather daunting. Let me walk you through the steps of the "little yard sale that could" :)
First, you realize something. You realize that you have a lot of "shit" you need to get rid of, but you have no idea where to start. Who really needs roughly 35 pairs of nursing scrubs? You've never worn that grape-colored outfit but, hey, you think you might wear it three months from now. Surely, everyone owns 15 scarves. And, must you have two identical pairs of gym shoes? Come on, Emily...get a grip! So, after what felt like months, I slowly weeded through the mounds and mounds of clothing, shoes, purses, scarves, etc...and, lined them all up. I had a stern discussion with my belongings. I said, "belongings, we've had a good run together. It's not you, it's me. Me, realizing that I need some cash and you ain't cuttin' the mustard anymore. So long, farewell, be on your best behavior because mama is in need of a Mexican vacation".
Add two friends and there you have it. A two-day yard sale of epic proportions. Okay, so in the grand scheme of life, it wasn't that big, but it was big enough. After a lot of blood, sweat and tears (okay, so no one cried, except tears of joy when it was over!), we walked away with a pretty impressive amount of dough. Will I have another one? Probably so. But, let me accumulate even more junk first!
Apart from the actual selling of the junk is the even better people-watching. I never realized there were so many hard-core yard salers until this weekend. Also, no one really knows how to tell time when someone yells "YARD SALE". Last time I checked, a start time of 0700 doesn't mean you can come nearly knock the door down at 0530. I know you want junk, but take it down a notch. Everyone should have a fair shot at the "Linda Ronstadt's Greatest Hits" cassette tape. I think I should've had a starting line with a person pointing a shot gun up in the air. The hard-core people would've arrived at 0530 and could've meditated and stretched before the "race". Once they heard the shot, the could've sprinted to all the junk. "Hands off that seashell," one would say. "Hell no, you can't have that 1985 "We Are The World" T-shirt". People, it's junk. It's okay if you actually show up when it starts. Some people will never learn...you won't miss the good stuff. It's crap. All of it. Hence the reason why it's all outside of the house, sort of resembling "Sanford and Son".
Back to the people-watching. Yard sales bring out people that I don't think have showed their faces in public in years. And, said people bring the whole "fam damily" with them. Little Johnny yells, "don't forget to bring granny. She may need some new perm rods". Or, you just might get hit on by old men and, of course, on the day that you don't take a shower. You look like a real winner. You gather that the man probably had cataracts. Or, he just likes to flirt with anything that has a pulse. Believe me, I think I saw him making eyes at a cat strolling by.
I guess the old saying is true. "One man's trash is another man's treasure". Now, who wants to listen to some Linda Ronstadt?
