What You Give Is What You Get :)

So, I'm not a huge fan of reading.  Before you start with the jokes, let me say this...YES, I do know how to read.  I just don't have a huge passion for it.  Which is why, before leaving work last Friday, I probably did the big "eye roll" when I was told I had to read a few books.  Because I am a supervisor.  A wave of nausea came over me.  Seriously?  I randomly have six days off in a row and now I have to spend part of it reading?  For work, no less.  Well, this little break wasn't starting off well.

Fast forward to today.  Crap, I had completely forgotten about my reading assignment.  How silly would I look if I showed up to work tomorrow and had not even opened it.  So, this morning, after giving myself a pep talk, I started reading.  Now, let me explain something.  This book is actually work-related.  It's entitled "Inspired Nurse".  Once again, was God watching out for me?  I can't lie when I say I've been uninspired in my career for the past several months.  Nursing just didn't feel all that "inspiring" to me anymore.  I've had days where I really questioned why I even started down this road in the first place.  Nursing would be really great, if not for all the other "stuff".  There's A LOT you don't learn in nursing school.  At any rate, I've been in a nursing slump for a while.  And, I guess this was my way out.  Anyway, I kept reading.  And, reading.  And, reading.  Needless to say, I read the entire book today.  That's a HUGE accomplishment for me.  A nurse wrote the book.  Rich Bluni, RN, as a matter of fact.  I'd give anything to meet this man.  The stories in this book left me happy, joyous, inspired, gracious, humbled, just to name a few.  I even shed a few tears.  I'm really going to have to invest in more tissues.  Maybe, I just need to invest some stock in Kleenex.

I could go on and on about this book, but I won't.  Most of you "non-nurses" probably wouldn't care all that much.  I grumbled when faced with the fact that I had to read this book.  Boy, I wish I would've known better!  In one chapter, he talks about "looking for reasons to be inspired".  Basically, what he says is the that what we manifest into our life becomes our reality where inspiration is concerned.  If you look for inspiration, inspiration will find you.  Sort of like the "do unto others" motto we've all heard millions of times.

WOW.  I think I finally get what it means to be a nurse.  Maybe, more importantly, what it means to be a person.  A person that is good.  A person that inspires.  Sure, I can inspire the people that I take care of when I work, but I don't feel like that necessarily flows over to my personal life.  I sometimes have heard about a so-called "nursing face".  Get to work, leave your problems at the door and just take care of your patients.  They are sick.  They are not at their best and they certainly DON'T deserve your irritation that you might have been running late because of traffic.  Or, maybe you got pulled over on the way to these patients.  So what!  Suck it up, drop the "baggage" at the front door and remember why you chose this profession in the first place.  BECAUSE YOU WANT TO MAKE A DIFFERENCE IN THE LIFE OF SOMEONE BESIDES YOURSELF.  After all, it's not even about us nurses.  If we didn't have patients, then we wouldn't have a job.  And, I don't know about you, but I don't want to live on the street with no money.  I like to shop.

Maybe we could all start living with a "nursing face".  What happened to genuine kindness and respect?  I'm not asking you to "fake it".  I'm talking about being more appreciative of life.  So, you might not have the greatest job, nicest car, biggest house.  At least you have a job, car, and house to call your own.  Are you able to pay your bills and eat every day?  I think the answer is yes.  Are you relatively healthy?  Most of us are.  Some of us aren't.  Be grateful for each day that you spend outside the place that pays me and most other nurses.

I suppose I should read this and take some of my own advice.  It's nothing I haven't heard before.  Truthfully, I think most of us learned this a LONG time ago.  We just get so caught up in the hustle and bustle of life, we forget to slow down and breath.  I have A LOT I need to work on to better myself.  First of all, I need much more patience.  Not to be confused with "patients", but they are the reason I have a job...ha!  I am so impatient...with everything and everyone.  I want what I want when I want it.  It's how I've always lived.  So what if people don't like it (or so I used to think).  Maybe I need to stop and "just breath".  It might take more time than I want, but I'll get there eventually.  Until then, I'm still hoping that some smart person invents a "more patience" pill.  There's a pill for everything else.  Why not that?

I am much too hard on myself.  I guess I am my own worst enemy.  However, if I can be my own worst enemy, I can probably be my own best friend, too.  And, THAT'S how I need to start thinking.  None of us are perfect.  It's when we stop and look at all the good in our lives that we see that our imperfections aren't all that bad.  I know I'm clumsy.  And, a smart mouth.  And, not a fan of reading.  Or, eating anything with mushrooms in it. I tend to let whatever I am thinking come out of my mouth in the wrong way.   I also tend to think the worst in EVERY situation.  It's much easier to think that way, then you won't be so let down in the end.  WRONG way to think.  I'm learning to be much more positive.  I have the power to be anything I want.  Go anywhere I want.  So, I'm leaving that little "Negative Nancy" inside me at home.  Nancy, go to your room.  You're grounded...for the rest of MY life :)

When I first started nursing, I thought I knew it all.  I have been proven wrong  nearly each and every day since then. It's been one hell of an almost six-year journey.  A few months ago, I hit a wall.  I didn't want to have anything to do with this profession.  My heart wasn't in it.  I've always believed that life isn't a coincidence.  I also believe that I was meant to read this book.  At this time.  I'm very grateful that someone's watching over me.  Now, I know that I was born to do this.  I was born to help people.  In good times and in bad.  Nurses see people at their VERY worst.  What an incredible feeling knowing that I can make a small difference in the life of someone that I have had the privilege of caring for...and, that is why I do this.  It's not about the money.  It's not about the accolades.  It's about the patient.  It's something that I think MOST nurses need reminded of on a daily basis.

Sure, nursing is not "puppy dogs and rainbows" all the time.  In fact, some days are hard.  Really hard.  I will never forget the first patient that died in my care.  Could I do this for the next 30+ years?  Unfortunately, death is always going to be a part of this job.  Fortunately, it's not THE only part.  For every patient that has died, there is a patient that does, in fact, get better.  What a transformation seeing someone so very sick and so very well in a matter of days.  And, to know that I might have had a small part in that...well, it's the icing on this great big cake of mine.  Yes, I relate pretty much all I can to food.  Probably something I love almost as much as nursing!

"YOU GET WHAT YOU GIVE".  The name of Zac Brown Band's new album.  Also, a chapter in this book.  It really is true.  Not just in nursing, but in life.  I don't know about you, but I'm gonna stop and smell the roses more.  I'm gonna be just a little more patient.  I'm gonna see the good in people, no matter what.  I'm gonna stop thinking it's all about me.  I'm gonna stop trying to be perfect...at everything.  Okay, so I might have a little bit of trouble with that last part!  I can't help it...I am "type-A" all the way.  I'm a work in progress...and, I think I'll get there.

If I'm lucky, I've got a lot of livin' yet to do.  And, A LOT of people to care for and about.  But, I'll be leaving the all-white uniform, cap and hosiery at home!

So, I'll leave you with this thought  (if anyone actually reads this!) .  What or who inspires you?  What or who makes you get up each day and want to be a better person?  I think you'd be surprised at the answer(s)!  So, go on.  Figure it out.  Quit just "going through the motions" and start inspiring yourself and others around you.

It wouldn't be a typical "Emily Blog" without at least a little bit of "funny".  So, I'll share this with you.  When you think you're having a bad day, remember this.  I have fallen down multiple times at work.  I've spilled things all over my uniform and the uniforms of co-workers (BETADINE is NOT a toy!).  I've also been in the process of taking care of someone and had the crotch of my pants rip wide open.  No joke.  People, like I've said many times before, I couldn't make this stuff up, even if I tried.  But, maybe that's what I personally bring to this profession that is known as NURSING...a whole lot of laughs!  Last time I checked, just because you're sick doesn't mean you don't know how to laugh until you sides hurts :)