Three Point One

They say you should write  about what you know.  I don't know much about running, but I'm sure gonna write about it.  Yesterday, I did something that I was sure I'd never be able to do...I ran a 5K.

For those of you who aren't in the know, a 5K is the equivalent of 3.1 miles.  Before, this was an unattainable distance to my former overweight self.  Heck, I could barely run the 2 mile Schweizer Fest run.  And, I use the term "run" very loosely.  I've participated in several SF runs, but was never able to actually run the entire race.  And, I always felt like I needed CPR at the finish line.  Most of the spectators probably thought I needed it, too!!  My dad actually ran the race with me years ago after he had lost several pounds.  That race always stands out in my mind because, as he was effortlessly running way ahead of me (so far, in fact, I couldn't even see his bald head), a man who I know yelled, "your sixty year-old dad is beating you!".  Talk about a reality check.  Yes, my dad did beat me and then some that year and I even think he got second in his age group.  Me?  Well, let's just say I won the award for THE most out-of-breath and red-faced participant.  I sucked.  Everyone kept telling me how awesome it was just to have been out pounding the pavement so early on a weekend.  I never really believed that statement until yesterday.  Remember?  I ran a 5K.

A few weeks ago, I signed up to run the St. Patrick's Day Dash.  My goal was to run the entire race, never mind the fact that I hadn't run much at all in the last several months.  So, I decided I should probably give it a whirl on the treadmill.  How hard could it be?  Ha!  I had lost my muffin top, so I figured it would be a piece of cake!  Anyway, over the last couple of weeks, I was able to run 3.14, 3.67 and finally 5.58 miles on the treadmill!!  I flexed my muscles a bit after my last treadmill run, an hour of non-stop running.  I felt like the energizer bunny...I kept going...and going...and going.  I just knew I would be ready come race day.

Over the last several months, I've really done A LOT of research on fitness and nutrition.  I wanted to lose weight the right way.  The safe way.  No gimmicks, no pills.  Just losing it the old-fashioned way...eating healthy and exercising.  So, I've researched.  And, studied.  And, asked a lot of questions.  I went straight to those who had lost weight and kept it off.  I wanted to know all their secrets, especially if I was going to coach a BL team.  This week, I scoured the net for foods to eat the night before and the morning of a race.  I followed it right down to the "your last bite should be chewed twelve hours before you start the race".  Yes, I didn't eat a single bite after eight o'clock Friday evening!  There are far worse things than going to bed hungry!  

Yesterday morning, the alarm on my phone went off at 5:35 AM!!!  Who gets up that early on a weekend off from work?  Yep, this newbie runner.  After consuming a light breakfast, I stretched, made sure my playlist was set and laced up my green and pink sneakers.  Sure, I felt as if I could vomit, but I was ready!  This was it.  It was now or never.

After a pretty drive to Owensboro, Team Everbody's was ready!!  It was great to see so many people show up, whether their goal was to run, walk or do a little bit of both.  It was especially great to see my RED TEAM represented so well...we had seven team members there...I was one happy coach!!  After a few pre-race rules, I was off.  I started out slow because I've made the mistake in the past of just going all out at the very beginning.  Makes sense that if you start out really fast, you get to the finish line faster...ha ha!  So, I started out slow.  I felt good.  Alicia Keys' "Girl on Fire" was the first song that I heard yesterday.  What a great opening song to get me going!  If you don't have it on your playlist, I suggest you download it...now!  Although the tempo is not as fast-paced as what I like when running, it's motivating...powerful...and just what I needed at the start.  The 5K route was designed so all the runners ahead of me had to run right by me to get back to the finish line...I liked this idea.  It was neat to see all my friends and gym family giving a "thumbs up" or a high-five along the way.  You wanna know what else was neat?  Crossing the damn finish line in my fastest time ever of 32.14!!!!  I never had to stop to walk...I ran the entire 3.1 miles...one of THE proudest moments of my life to date!  Another proud moment was seeing several of my red team members reaching their personal goals.  The only downside about yesterday...I was so nervous, I forgot to turn on my Nike Run app on my phone so I have no idea what my pace times were yesterday...lesson learned for next time!!!  

Even this morning, I can't stop smiling.  I ran my very first 5K.  I never stopped to walk.  I made it under my own personal goal.  And, I never quit.  Running is hard...very hard.  What kept me going was something a fellow runner said to me a few days ago...just put one foot in front of the other.  That's exactly what I did and my feet, courage and a little bit of faith carried me to the first of many finish lines.

YOU DON'T HAVE TO GO FAST...YOU JUST HAVE TO GO!!!  

Besides, even Jesus loves turtles!! :)

Patience, Young Grasshopper! :)

We've all heard of virtues.  According to any standard dictionary, a virtue is defined as behaving showing high moral standards or a quality considered morally good or desirable in a person.  Sure, I consider myself generous, caring, courteous, friendly, etc...but the one virtue that has baffled me for most of  my adult life is PATIENCE.  Why am I not more patient?  Why do I always want what I want when I want it?  I never understood the full value of being patient until I stepped on the dreaded scale in September.

Most of you know the ins and outs of my weight-loss journey, so I won't bore you with all the details.  What I will share with you is my journey to being a more patient person and how that's spilling over into other areas of my life.

I've being overweight most of my adult life.  Just like most of you, I would gain, then lose...gain, then lose, gain...and, well you know the rest.  I used every excuse in the book, with the biggest one being my underactive thyroid.  I figured that was the culprit which was making me fat...that tiny gland in one's throat that is responsible for so many body functions.  Once I realize that I couldn't hide behind my stupid excuses, I decided that I needed to make a change...or else.  Of course, like most of you, I wanted 50 pounds gone in one week.  Seems reasonable, right?  WRONG!!  I finally made a decision that, if I was going to finally be successful at losing weight AND keeping it off, I'd need to explore this patience thing that I'd heard so much about over the years.

Fast-forward to present day, which is six months along the journey to a new and improved me.  Have I completely mastered the art of patience?  Not exactly.  But, I feel I've developed the tools that will allow me to seek that virtue more and more, even outside my weight-loss journey.  Losing weight has actually been the best idea I've ever had.  I have grown so much as a person, no pun intended!  Ha!  I used to second-guess and doubt.  Now, I know that I can and will make it to my goal of losing 50 lbs...FIFTY POUNDS!!!  Who does that?  Well, I'm hopeful that I can add my name to the list!

My journey has taught me so many valuable lessons.  Many of you who have done this before have probably learned some of the same lessons.  I can honestly say that I like myself completely for the first time in my life.  Now, I know it's okay NOT to be perfect.  It's okay if I have a little cellulite.  It's okay if I splurge once a week because I know I will get back on track the next day.  It's okay if I nearly fall off the elliptical at the gym (which actually happened this week after I noticed a cute guy a few machines over from me...yes, I'm still a klutz!!).  It's okay if I take a few days off from working out.  AND, it's okay if I don't know what's next.  I've learned to take it one pound at a time.  There have been a few weeks that I have gained weight.  I threw my little mental tantrum, then got over it.  My journey has had its ups and downs. I've been knocked down but the most important part is that I've gotten back up, dusted myself off and continued on the road.  It's okay if I'm not married with a houseful of kids at my age.  I've always been told that you have to love yourself before you could expect anyone else to love you.  Well, I think it's MY time.  I'm ready.

For anyone who is still on the fence about taking the step to be healthier, I say GO FOR IT!  There is a HUGE obesity epidemic in this country and we need to practice some tough love with each other and do something about it.  Take care of your body.  Use it everyday.  Besides, it's the only place you have to live.  This journey should NOT be about restrictions and deprivations, as I have been taught.  Instead, it should be about making small changes that are realistic and that you can stick with for many years down the road.

"You will get there when you are meant to get there and not one moment sooner...so relax, breathe and be patient".

I found this quote recently and it sums up my life these days.  So universe, I'll say this to you...I'm patiently waiting for whatever or whomever comes next.  And, for once, I'm not nervous or afraid!!

How Do You Measure, Measure A Year?

There are 525,600 minutes in a year.  And, if you've ever seen the musical "Rent", there's even a song about it.  The lyrics ask, "how do you measure, measure a year?"

It seemed like just yesterday I was ringing in a new year...I had high hopes for my life in 2012, as I'm sure millions of people had the same thoughts.  We all make resolutions to lose weight, be more kind, patient, and the list goes on and on and on.  I never make resolutions because I rarely, make that NEVER, stick to any of them.  Sure, I am good for the month of January, then it seems to go downhill quickly.  I think it's the fact that the sun rarely shines until about mid-March!  So, at this time last year, I really had no set plan for 2012.  Basically, I just wanted to make it to see another year.  Well, I did and then some...

The year unfolded as most have done for the past several years.  Meet new people, make new memories, spend time with old and new friends, work, eat, sleep and repeat.  Nothing really monumental happened until September 5th.  Granted, the year prior to this date was great!  Looking back, though, I can say this was the day that gave me my life back.  Yes, it sounds corny.  But, it's my story and my life.  If you wanna continue reading, better grab a snack!!

Let me tell you what led me to Sept. 5th...I joined a new gym last February.  In may, the gym advertised a "Biggest Loser" competition.  I didn't sign up because, at that time, I told myself I couldn't do it and didn't need to lose weight.  This is coming from someone who, prior to this year, didn't like to step on a scale.  In my mind, I was healthy if I worked out.  Hell, I worked out so I could eat complete crap 24/7.  In August, after the success of the first BL contest, there was talk of doing a second one.  Something told me to pay attention this time.  I can't really pinpoint what made me want to consider this...maybe it was the talk I had with myself.  Yes, I actually sat myself down and had a talk with myself.  Why couldn't I do this?  It seemed like so many others had had success...it was my turn.  For years, I had come up with some of the best (and lamest) excuses as to why I couldn't lose weight...I blamed it on my thyroid, working nights, the weather, etc!!  So, after my "talking to" with myself, I signed up.  I thought that, if it was a big flop again, I was only out $10.

Fast-forward to Sept 5th.  I remember that Wednesday well.  I put on my "gym best" and marched my happy ass down to the gym.  I was gonna show the scale who was boss.  I really had no idea how much I weighed but, when I stepped on the scale, I was SHOCKED...204 lbs.  Yes, you read that right.  204 big lbs!!!  Surely, this was some kind of mistake.  I am addicted to the gym and I weight 204 lbs?  Part of me wanted to run away and hide.  I'm not gonna lie...I was nearly in tears.  I had let myself go and I hated the number staring back at me.  At that moment, it was time to show the world (and myself) that I could do it this time!

I won't relive the entire 11 weeks.  Long story short, I lost 27.2 lbs during the competition, was named my team's "biggest loser" for losing the highest percentage of weight and came in 2nd among over 100 participants!  WTH?  Yes, I almost won the whole damn contest!  Me, who almost didn't sign up.  Me, who has gained and lost so much weight over the last 10 years.  Me, who didn't think I could even lose five pounds!!  Wow, talk about a life-changing last quarter of 2012!!

I can't imagine living through something as HUGE as weight loss and not learning anything.  In 11 weeks, I lost 27.2 lbs...that's the average weight for a two year-old boy or girl!  I lost a child!!  Ha ha!  Since the contest ended, I've lost an additional 3-4 pounds, bringing my total so far to around 31-32 lbs.  I am still in awe of what I've accomplished.  Yes, I talk about it all the time and some of you might be tired of hearing it.  You know what?  I don't care.  When it comes to weight loss, I say brag away!

Okay, here comes the point in the story where I tell you what I've learned.  I can do anything...anything!! Before I started this journey, I wasn't so sure.  Now, I know that, no matter what life throws at me, I can conquer it!  Also, I found something I'd being lacking for so many years...my confidence.  If you've never been overweight, then maybe you don't understand this.  Maybe you've known me for years or maybe you just see me about town and still don't get this.  I've always hidden behind mt weight and used it as a crutch to NOT do a lot of different things because I didn't think I could...NEVER AGAIN!  I learned that I am such a strong person, mentally AND physically!  I finally believe in myself and I think that, no matter your abilities, your belief can take you to places that you once thought you could never travel!!  I also learned that accountability is key.  Knowing that I had to weigh-in every week and hold myself accountable to my team helped me tremendously.  I am certain that I couldn't have done this on my own.  I will never forget the support that I received from my Everbody's family, my team and my friends and family!  At times, I was in tears...and, if you know me well, you know I don't cry!

About a month ago, I was asked by the owners of the gym if I wanted to be a coach during the third "biggest loser" contest.  I laughed it off and didn't think much about it until they kept on asking...they are very persistent!  Why not me?  I trusted in the process and it worked for me.  Surely I could teach others!  I finally said yes.  Apparently, they believe in me enough and feel I'm fully capable of the task at hand and, for that, I am most grateful!

So, there you have it, folks.  I've gotten rid of 32 lbs. since Sept. 5th and I have no intention of finding the weight ever again!  Yes, seeing 172 on the scale is mind-blowing!  But, I think what's even cooler is the fact that I have actually inspired others to do what I nervously did four months ago...join the "biggest loser" contest!  That's what makes me happy...hearing that I have inspired someone to join a gym, walk to work, eat a little less and move a little more.  How awesome!  I still have about 10-13 more pounds I'd like to lose and, although it might be difficult, I will reach my goal!!

Finally, I now know how you measure a year...my year...2012.  I measure it with weight loss, and confidence, and courage and paying it forward.  I truly believe that I was meant to join the competition.  Not so much for the shrinking waistline, but for the ability to help others...to inspire...to change people's lives as so many people have done for me!

A new year is upon us.  I want to pay it forward and help those of you if are ready to change your life!  There are no shortcuts to any place worth going.  May 2013 bring you happiness, health, love, peace and the ability to regain your own life.  I'm living proof that YOU can do it, too!

Two Bowling Balls...

Except for a brief period of time in high school and right after I graduated from college, I have always been just a little bit fat.  Yeah, I called myself fat.  It's my blog, I can do what I want!  Anyway, I'm still convinced that my birth weight of 5 lbs., 6 oz. is a lie.  How could someone born that small turn out to be so big?  Well, ever heard of a place called Wendy's?  Yeah, I'm blaming Dave Thomas on this one.

I absolutely love the above named fast-food restaurant.  In my opinion, the best burgers around.  When I was little, I remember watching TV and loving all of the Wendy's commercials.  Dave seemed like an all-around swell guy who just so happened to make tasty food.  Plus, I thought it was so cool he named the chain after one of his daughters.  I secretly wished my own dad would pay homage to me in some similar fashion.  I'm still waiting on that wish to come true!  Anyway, I developed my love for all things greasy before  I finished elementary school.  I think you can see where this story is heading...

This isn't the part when I want anyone to feel sorry for me.  Believe me, I knew what I was doing.  I ate my emotions at all times and they always tasted great!  At any rate, I caught on at a pretty early age how I could make this work in my favor...if people thought I was funny, maybe they would forget my ass was the size of two bowling balls.  So, I started to tell jokes.  I would make them up and laugh out loud before presenting them to my family.  They weren't funny.  But, I think my parents laughed to humor me. Gee, people were laughing...I've gotta find some way to take this show outside my house.  So, over the next several years, I spend many hours making fun of myself.  For a long time, I fooled myself into thinking it actually worked.

I've learned something over the last year.  No matter how hard I try to act like the clown, it doesn't solve the real issue.  I've haven't really thought so highly of myself over the last few years.  I've never really set the standard for how people should be treating me...with respect.  Up until this point, I've tried to change in the hopes that people would like me...doing whatever it took to make that possible.  EPIC FAIL!  If you have to change to please someone, then you might as well forget it.  Losing weight for the umpteenth time has made me realize that I should NEVER have to change to please anyone...to some, this might be an oxymoron.  To me, it makes sense.  Now, I'm changing for ME.  I want to be healthy.  I want to be able to walk into any store and not worry about having to find the plus-size section.  I want someone to finally give a damn about me because I am a nice, funny, smart and pretty person, but not because I've lost weight.

There are too many people in this world who are so focused on what a person looks like that they miss out on some really great people, including me.  I now realize something...IT'S THEIR LOSS!!  If you don't like me because I'm not a size six, then you obviously aren't worth MY time.  I've ignored my fair share, too, because of my weight.  However,  it took me finally taking control of my waistline to realize all of this...I AM ENOUGH!!!

I don't have all the answers.  I'm just a girl who's trying to make it in this crazy thing I call life.  I screw up on a daily basis.  I'm much too hard on myself.  I don't have all the answers.  What I do have is an amazing support system and that's what keeps me going...NEVER GIVE UP!!

The only person I'm ever striving to be better than is the person I was yesterday...so far, so good!!

Confidence is key, no matter the situation...if you believe you've got "IT", so will everyone else!! :)

FOR ONCE, I WANNA BE A BIG LOSER!!

Yogi Berra once said, "Ninety percent of the game is half mental".  I thought a lot about this quote the night of September 4th.  Just another Tuesday in the life of yours truly.  However, this day was anything but ordinary.  This was my last day of eating everything not nailed down.  Because, for the first time in a LONG time, I was finally ready to do something I hadn't been able to do in years...LOSE WEIGHT.

For years, I've struggled with the number on the scale.  As a child, I was always heavier than all my classmates and friends.  My parents never sat me down and said, "you're eating everything on your plate because there are starving kids in Africa".  From a very early age, I ate everything on my plate and then some because I was hungry.  Constantly hungry.  It probably didn't help matters that, instead of wanting to go outside and play all the time, I planted my fat ass in front of the TV and had Nintendo tournaments with the neighborhood kids and our favorite pals, Mario and Luigi.  To this day, I still don't understand the purpose of that damn toad!!

At any rate, for most of my childhood, I was pudgy, especially during the dreaded years of Jr. High.  Talk about the three worst years of my life.  All my friends were getting taller and I was getting fatter.  I remember, while playing a very "competitive" game of volleyball in 6th grade gym class, one of my classmates called me fat.  I can't recall my exact facial expression at that time but, had I been one of those "rebel without a cause" kids, I would've hauled off and punched him in the face.  Luckily, my best friend said, in a voice I felt at the time could shatter glass, "Shut up, Barry".  We still laugh about that to this day!!  And, I'm glad that I can laugh about it.  Words are much like weapons.  They cut deep and leave scars that sometimes never go away.  When you're bigger than the average bear, you are a little bit more sensitive, especially when you're a girl who's got a little extra "junk in her trunk".

In high school, I was on the swim team.  That was probably my first experience with exercise of any kind.  We would swim every day after school.  After getting home, it took everything I had to eat and finish my homework...I was exhausted!  As a result of my years on the team, I was the leanest and lightest I'd ever been...155 lbs!!  To a former fat girl, this was probably the greatest thing to ever happen to me at that point.  I felt and looked good, although my haircut and clothing choices still had a lot of room for improvement!!

High school quickly turned into college and the dreaded fifteen somehow turned into the "dreaded I lost count somewhere in between all the ice cream, pizza and beer I consumed".  However, even though I had gained back all the weight I had lost and then some, this period of time was when I got well acquainted with a gym.  Looking back, as nervous as I was stepping into the land of all the perfect people, it really did save my life...until my thyroid surgery.

Fast-forward to me moving back home to go back to school.  Nursing school, to be exact.  Throughout my nursing school years, I also was a member of Weight Watchers.  Before I moved home, I had started the program and continued it when I moved back to town.  Over a span of nine months, I lost 50 lbs. and I felt like I could accomplish anything.  Too bad my thyroid had other plans.  I had been nursing for about six months when I noticed there was something wrong with my neck.  One side was increasingly larger than the other and it seemed as if it happened overnight.  Naturally, since I had RN behind my name, I just assumed it was cancer.  After appointments and tests, I was diagnosed with hypothyroidism.  I had what one doctor described as the biggest goiter he'd ever seen.  Mr. Potato Head was encompassing the entire left lobe of my thyroid.  There was a chance it was cancer, something I had assumed even before I realized what was happening.  I had surgery in Feb. 2006 and was relieved to get the news it wasn't cancer!  Since my surgery, it has become more difficult to drop even a pound.  To make matters worse, I have gained back most of the weight I had lost during WW.  For the last several months, no matter how much blood, sweat and tears I put in at the gym, the number on the scale wouldn't budge.

About a month ago, I had an epiphany.  If I didn't do something and soon, things were gonna get ugly!  I vowed right then that I would do whatever it took to lose my "food baby" weight and for good!  During the summer, my gym had a "Biggest Loser" contest.  At the beginning of the summer, I convinced myself that I couldn't do it, so I didn't join.  Well, the second "Biggest Loser" contest started September 5th with me as a contestant.  Could I do this?  Could I really do this?  The night before, I jokingly referred to my evening meal as my "last supper" and scarfed down a double baconator and large fries from Wendy's.  It was THE best burger and fries I had ever eaten!  I was in Heaven.  The next day, I faced the scale and about vomited when I saw the dreadful number staring back at me...204.  I include it in this blog because it holds me accountable.  Sure, some of you may be shocked.  Maybe you thought it wasn't possible I could weigh that much.  Maybe you thought the number would've been a lot higher.  I was embarrassed.  How did I let myself get back into the 200's??  Obviously, if I had known the answer, I wouldn't been back there!!!

Even though I'm only three days into the contest, I feel so much better, moth mentally and physically.  Remember what Yogi said?  Well, this is what I say...100% of dieting is ALL mental.  For years, I told myself that I couldn't do it.  Why did I want to eat apples when I could have that greasy slice of pizza?  Well, you know what?  I finally get it.  You have to believe and want it more than you've ever wanted anything in life.  I had to completely change my way of thinking.  Instead of the "life is short, eat whatever you want" mentality that has brought me to this point, I now see life a bit differently.  I can't call it a diet because diets are too restricting.  In my opinion, it's an entire lifestyle change.  If I was going to do this, I was going to do this right.  Not only was I going to change my eating, but I was going to have to hold myself accountable, and that meant recording EVERYTHING I put in my mouth!  This last bit has proved to be the key.  When you have to see in print on on an app everything you've eaten over the course of a day, you become much more aware of what is good and what is gonna be a minute on the lips, a lifetime on the hips!

So, I'm on my my umpteenth weight-loss journey.  Will I be a big loser at the end?  I sure hope so!  Whatever happens, I already consider myself a loser for having the courage to face my food addiction head on.  I may not be where I want to be, but I'm a lot closer than I was three days ago!!

"If you eat what you've always eaten, you'll weigh what you've always weighed".  People, I'm no expert, but I'm simply trying to eat a little less and move a little more.  If I can do it, you can, too!!  Make a commitment today to change your life...and, your underwear on a daily basis!! :)

Hoosier Hysteria!

After last night's Sweet 16 game, I felt compelled to write about my love for IU.  If you know me, you know I'm a die-hard fan.  I guess you could say I've been a fan since birth...literally!!  I can't remember exactly when I first started watching the boys in the candy striped pants, but it could not have been long after I lost my first tooth and began walking.

The first real memory I have of IU basketball was the 1987 championship game.  Actually, I remember that entire year.  I was obsessed with Steve Alford and anything red or white.  Alford was having an autograph session at a store in Evansville, so I begged mom and dad to take me.  Sure enough, I'll never forget walking up to meet him as a very nervous 8 year-old, overweight girl with glasses and a muffin top.  That moment was one I'll never forget!  I cherished the picture of my IU basketball idol forever and probably could find it today if I dug deep enough!!  "Hey, Stevie...shoot a three pointer"!!  At any rate, IU made it to the final game of the NCAA tourney in 1987 and there was no way I was missing such an important game.  I felt really cool because I got to stay up late on a school night.  I sat glued to the TV, taking in all the lights, sounds and shots.  That's probably where I developed my love for pacing the carpet and yelling at the TV. Surely the team would hear their biggest fan yelling for them!!  To a kid, forty minutes of basketball felt like 40 hours!  In the end, Keith Smart made the shot that was heard 'round the world and IU had its fifth national championship banner!  Way to go, Bobby Knight and his signature red sweater!!

There are obviously many more memories of IU through the years.  I knew I wanted to go to school there the minute I decided to use the potty like a big girl.  Honestly, it was THE only school to which I applied.  I was getting accepted to IU...period.  In my opinion, there was no other school.  Sure, I could've applied to my mom's alma mater, UE, or dad's alma mater, ISU, and hopefully get some scholarships, but those schools were not even options.  My motto?  IU OR BUST!  Long story short, my four years at IU were some of THE best in my life.  I met so many people and still call some of them friends to this day.  I loved IU for so many reasons.  Besides my love of IU men's basketball, I loved the campus.  I was in no way intimidated by it's vastness.  IU is one of the most beautiful college campuses in the country.  The rolling hills of central Indiana, along with the changing seasons, made each year I spent there even more special. If I had to do it all over again, I would in a heartbeat.  My senior year, I even helped with the football team (which is where I think I developed my love for men in uniform)!!  I got to meet some of the players on both the football and basketball teams.  It was a fun, four year ride at the greatest school in the world!!

So, it's no secret I've bled "red and white" for most of my 33 year existence.  I love the HOOSIERS, in victory and defeat.  The last few years haven't been so kind to the program, until a man named Tom Crean was hired to rebuild the team, which some fans expected to happen overnight.  The last three years have been a little less than great, that is, until a boy named Cody Zeller made a commitment to play for the CREAM and CRIMSON.  People remember where they were when Kennedy was shot, the Challenger exploded or the Twin Towers fell to the ground.  I hope you're one of the lucky ones that can say you remember what you were doing when Zeller committed to IU.

WOW...WHAT A SEASON!  Top 20 rankings, memorable wins over UK, Ohio State and Michigan St. and watching Crean and Co. bring the program back to basketball prominence once again!!  I'm proud to say I'm a HOOSIER fan for life!!  After all, it's really not natural (or healthy!!) to bleed blue! :)

HOO HOO HOO HOOSIERS!!  Thanks for a memorable season, IU!  Your biggest fan is excited for the future!  IU basketball is baaaaaaaack! :)

Act Like A Lady, Think Like A Man

A few weeks ago, I bought a book.  I'm not much of a reader, although I do enjoy reading what I call "fluff" books on occasion.  At any rate, a title struck my fancy, so I grabbed the book and threw it in my cart.  The name of the book is "Act like a lady, think like a man".  I'll have to admit, I was a little embarrassed to scan this item by the nice Walmart worker.  So, I used the self-checkout.  After getting home, I quickly opened the book and started reading.  I had a small amount of time to kill, so I decided to read at least the first chapter.  I started laughing at the thought of even reading such a book.  After all, I figured I already knew how men thought, so why did I need to waste time reading something Steven Harvey wrote.  Granted, he's a very funny comedian, but I had a feeling he would be "preaching to the choir", so to speak.  A funny thing happened that day.  I read the whole damn book!  I couldn't put it down.  While some of the information contained in the book was mostly "duh", some of it actually surprised me.  And, made me change my way of thinking about members of the opposite sex.  I loved this book so much, I feel like I must share what I have learned.

Men are simple creatures.  Ladies, repeat this to yourselves every single second of every single day.  It's not rocket science (although, for the last 18 years, I thought otherwise).  Men are driven by three things...who they are, what they do and how much they make.  Seems easy enough.   Until all three goals are accomplished, you can forget about getting that guy in line behind you at McDonald's to ever focus on you.  Or, me.

Men don't love like women.  Never have, never will.  A woman's love is compassionate, generous, kind, nurturing, sweet and unconditional.  If a woman loves a man, she'll walk on water for him, no matter how he's acted act, the crazy thing he's said or done or no matter the time or demand.  Basically, a woman's love stands the test of time and logic.  A man?  Well, don't expect any of the above.  If you do, you're in for a rude awakening.  A man's love is very simple, direct and probably a lot harder to come by.  Let's be honest, a man who loves a woman is not going to call her every thirty minutes to give her an update on how much he loves her.  He's not going to sit around and dote on her every word or whisper sweet nothings in her ear.  I learned that a man's love is simple and he'll do each of the following three things to show his love:  Profess, Provide and Protect.  He'll tell anyone he meets.  He'll bring home the bacon to make sure his woman is provided for in the best way.  He'll do his best to make sure that no one does anything even remotely offensive to his woman.  This is how a man loves.  Plain and simple.  I'll let you down easy and just tell you now...he may never go shopping with you to buy a new dress, but he'll escort to the party and make sure everyone in attendance knows your his woman!!

Did you know that all men want to sleep with you?  If a man likes what he sees, he's gonna make it his mission to find out how he can sleep with you.  When a man approaches you, he has an agenda.  He want something and that "something" is what Steve Harvey referred to as the "cookie".  And, I don't think he was talkin' about Oreos!!!  That's right...all men want sex.  When you know that up front, then you can cut all the chitchat and lay down your requirements.  If he's willing to put in the time and work, he'll call.  Otherwise, you know he was just in it for the "cookie".  Those men?  Yeah, forget about them. They're just out for a good time.  Stop thinking it's a reflection on you, because it's not!  One of my favorite sayings is this...IT'S HIS LOSS!  Repeat that to yourself and roll on.

I also learned there are two types of women.  Sports Fish vs. Keepers.  Or, what most of us refer to as Sluts vs. Saints.  A sports fish doesn't have any rules, requirements, self-respect or guidelines.  Men can pick up that scent a mile away.  You might know her as the party girl who will chug a beer, then announce to a potential mate that she "just wants to date and see how it goes".  She's not a relationship kind of gal and has no expectations.  She makes it very clear up front that she's just along for the ride, so to speak.  In essence, she's let the man know that he can treat her any way he'd like.  And, believe me, he'll do just that.  Why wouldn't ALL men run and sign up for that!?!?!  A keeper never gives in easily and the requirements start the minute the man opens his mouth.  She is powerful and she commands respect.  Men can bring their "A" game and, while she might be somewhat impressed with the lines men give her, there's no guarantee she's going to let the conversation go any further.  Or, even give a man her number.  If a man wants this type of lady, he'll have to follow her requirements or follow the yellow brick road all the way to the exit sign because she's done with games and isn't interested in playing.  Nice try, but all you get are parting gifts, Romeo!

Men respect standards...GET SOME!  No need to explain this.  It's very cut and dry.  While men appreciate it when women let them know what they require in a relationship, I also believe women need to step back and let a man show her what he's made of.  Basically, prove that he's worthy of your time.  Let a man show you what he's willing to do for you.  I think you'll be surprised at the outcome!!

I could go on and on and on, but I won't.  As I said before, it's not rocket science.  Men are simple.  Some women (like myself) like to complicate things.  If a guy likes you, he'll let you know.  He'll call.  He'll text.  He'll go out of his way to tell you he likes you.  If a guy treats you as if he doesn't give a shit, he genuinely doesn't give a shit.  This is where MOST women need help.  I say this because I've been one of "those" girls.  I've met my fair share of some interesting men.  I've heard all the lines.  I could write a book.  I made excuses for them.  Oh, maybe he's playing hard to get.  I'm sure he's just lost my number.  Maybe he was taken out to the woods and eaten by a bear.  The list goes on and on.  It's taken me a LONG time to change my way of thinking.  Believe me, I had to have A LOT of talks with myself.  I used to think it was a reflection on me.  Oh, if I just lost 20 more pounds, he'll like me.  I'll just drink three more beers to loosen up and he'll surely come sit by me.  Yes, it's crazy, but I think more women are like this and don't want to admit it.  I fell for it all, hook, line and sinker.  When a girl doesn't think too highly of herself, it's quite easy to get fooled by a man.

Let me make something very clear...THIS IS NOT A MAN-BASHING BLOG.  It's simply my thoughts as I learned them from a very good book.  I think I finally understand how it works.  Women need to have some self-respect.  We should make men work for what they want.  Don't make it so easy.  If he gets the cookie up front, he'll run and go find someone else who'll give him more of the cookie.  Maybe even a better batch.  In that case, forget him!  Now you know he was only out for a good time.  These are the types of men who only want the "sports fish" and not someone that, ten years from now, will be a part of his family portrait hanging on the wall.  Declare it "HIS LOSS" and go flaunt yourself to someone who will work for your time and attention.  I'm not saying there's anything wrong with those men.  It's just not right for a girl who's looking for a long-lasting relationship.

One of my favorite sayings is the following:

"THOSE WHO LIKE ME, RAISE YOUR HAND.  THOSE WHO DON'T, RAISE YOUR STANDARDS".

Ladies, life is hard.  Don't complicate it by hanging on to guys who only want the cookie.  Run away from Cookie Monster, make a list of your requirements, then go find a man who's willing to work for it.  After all, men aren't gonna buy the cow when they can get the milk (and cookies) for free!!!

Happy searching.  Dating is hard.  It's even harder when you think Romeo has actually been eaten by that bear! :)

Great...now I want an OREO!!